Post by JORDYN DANIELLE MOORE. on Feb 25, 2010 16:31:54 GMT -5
JORDYN DANIELLE MOORE.
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* FEELS JUST LIKE WE'RE LOSING CONTROL.
and if you let go, then i'll let go tonight.[/center]
TELL US ABOUT YOURSELF.
"well hi, my names jordyn or my full name, if you want to annoy me, is jordyn danielle moore. my nicknames would be jord or jordy but please remember to only call me either of those if you really know me, which is highly unlikely. my birthday is october 31st, which i find slightly amusing. i'm seventeen years young. i have a vagina if you haven't yet noticed because yes, i am a girl. my sexual orientation? well i'm all into the boys. as far as my education goes, well i went to school but that really didn't turn out so well. i'm not really a social person and i'm way too harmful to myself to really care about anything else. as far as sex goes? well i've never had sex before. getting too intimate with someone really scares me. i can do cuddling and showing affection as like holding hands and such but if it gets any more deeper than that I just wanna turn and run away. that is if i let anyone close enough to actually find that they like me anyways.
most people tell me i look like jacquelyne marie. some model from california or something like that. i've seen her before and all and i guess we're similiar but i wouldn't say i look just like her. hm, i guess i can give a little bit of a description of myself. i have long pink hair, yes, thats right i did say pink. my eyes are a sea green color and i love them. i'm about five foot six so i'm not really short but i'm not that tall either. i don't wear a lot of make-up, at least not most of the time. every now and again i might get a little carried away with it. as far as my weight? i'm about 110 soaking wet. so yes, i am very tiny. my skin is slightly pale but hey, not everything can be just right and perfect. can it? no, it can't so back off. "
TELL US ABOUT YOUR MEDICAL HISTORY.
[/size][/font]"do you really have to ask what's wrong with me? i'm suicidal, i like to hurt myself in any way that i can. cutting with a razor is my specialty but i will in fact cut with anything that i can get a hold to. i also like to burn myself. that never gets old. cutting has been something i've done since i was 13 years old. apparently what i do has something to do with me having Borderline personality disorder. i don't know if understand that completely but hey, there the experts not me. the only thing i'm an expert on is cutting and self-harming myself. oh and thinking in black and white which is basically described as only thinking two sides of a situation will happen when there could be more outcomes. my moods change rather often, which make it hard for people to get too close to me. one minute i'm nice, happy and carefree and the next i may turned into the biggest bitch that you will ever meet in your life. my mood swings have been around since i was around eleven years old. it made it very hard for me, especially after a turn thirteen. most thought i was crazy and after i started self-harming myself, that was confirmed for a lot of people.
i was abused and molested by my mom's many boyfriends. you see, she's kind of a drug addicted tramp. that's why the doctor's say i self-harm myself. most tend to think i do it for attention but i don't. i don't show off my scars, cuts, burns, stabs or anything else I manage to do to me body. most think its all just a joke and that i can stop anytime i want but its not that easy. i've become pretty addicted to self-harming myself. every doctor i've seen said i've been by far the worst case of self-harm they've seen. my arms are the worst as far as scars go. my arms seem to be my favorite place to harm myself. easy access, i guess. either way though, most people tend to freak when they see what i've done to myself and most people my age don't want to have anything to do with me. they seem frightened by me but i have no intentions of hurting anyone around me, just myself.
and if what i mentioned weren't enough of a problem for me i also have this little thing called Self-defeating personality disorder. don't know what that means? well, let me explain. basically it means i often avoid or undermine pleasurable experiences, be drawn to situations or relationships in which i will suffer, and prevent others from helping me. so my mom being the bitch that she is, when she found out i had this, she thought it was my fault that i was abused and molested by those men so she sent me here. and so maybe i do need the help but it isn't my fault my mom can't get boyfriends that don't wanna abuse and molest her daughter. i never asked for any of it. "
HOW CAN WE ACCOMODATE YOU BETTER?
[/size][/font]"first off, keep any and all sharp objects away from me. razors, scissors, knifes, pencils... anything that i can use to hurt myself with. lighters are another thing i don't need to have. keep those away as well. i like to burn myself when i can't cut. i like to keep to myself for the most part but i do unterstand that i will need a roommate so i can't hurt myself. i get kinda paranoid if i think someone's following me so that might become a problem as well. i like to read, i don't like to talk all that much unless i find someone that i think i can trust. which is very, very seldom for me. i dislike rude, loud obnoxious people. i love skittles and sour patch kids. they keep me sane so please be sure to have plenty of those around. i really, really hate mornings so if you wake me up too early, you might want to run. i'm not really sure i have any strenghts but i have been told, when i let anyone close to me, that i am a really loyal person and i never do anything to betray their trust in me. i don't lie and i can't stand people who do. my fears would be finding someone that I actually like and then those feelings going too deep. as i said earlier i've never had sex and intimate relationships scare me. mostly because i'm too scared of letting someone in and then getting hurt by them. either by being abused, being molested or just being hurt by them in anyway possible. once i like someone, they seem to have a lot of power over me and what i do. i never do anything that they may not like and i don't like dissappointing them either.
my weaknesses.. well one would be shaggy-haired hotties. ha. though i tend to run away from them because i think that once they get to know me they won't like me. plus, i have a bad habit of thinking the worst and the best out of something and i normally decide the worst will happen way before i ever even try to get to know them, or let them get to know me. i have a weakness for any and all sweets. I'm also very stubborn. and that's probably a little bit of an understatement. my mom and i always had the biggest problem because we were both so stubborn. oh, yeah and coffee. coffee, coffee, coffee. its basically a must for me. i have to have it or i will go even more insane then i already am. please keep this in mind. "
TELL US ABOUT YOUR PAST.
[/size][/font]"well i was born in this town called albany and that's in new york. i was the only daughter to sarah and james moore. i grew up with basically the same childhood as any little girl. except for the fact that i was relatively spoiled by my dad, in which my mom hated it. after she realized i was really close to my dad, she tried to have more kids but never got pregnant. it was later discovered that my dad couldn't have any more kids for some odd reason. i don't know. i was only 3 at this time. when i was 5 though many things changed. for starters, my mom basically turned into this, for lack of a better word, bitch. she would constantly nag my dad about every little thing so in the end my dad got really depressed and sick and eventually killed himself. my mom later persisted to tell me that it was all my fault and that i was a faillure of a daughter. i was only five so it was hard for my mind to really comprehend very much. by the time i was 9, i blamed myself for my dad's death. that's when i discovered a note in some of my belongings. it was from my dad. he basically told me that he wanted to leave me something to remember him by and for me to know that it wasn't my fault he had killed himself. he loved me and it was my mom's fault. then i was only 9 so i never said anything to my mom about it. at the age of 12, my mom decided it was time for her to start dating again so she did. the first few weren't so bad but after about the 5th one, things went downhill from there. they'd stick around for a while when they realized the drug addicted whore actually had a pretty daughter. by the time i was 13 i had been molested by almost a hundred men. to this day i am still very much afraid of what one might do to me.
around that time was when i started to hurt myself. i couldn't find any other release for what was happening to me so i turned to hurting myself. my social life started to crumble after that. yes, my mom actaully let me have friends and go out and do things. it was the only way she figured she could get rid of me and i had no problem with that. it got me away from her many boytoys or whatever they were. however by the time i was 14 i'd lost most of my friends. they all noticed a big change in me and they couldn't deal with it anymore. my many mood swings had me cussing out most of them at any given time. they couldn't handle it anymore. and things procedded to get worse. the abuse started again shortly after that. i had no choice but to be at home and no matter what i tried to do, even if i did try to hide, they'd just find me and then whatever they did would be worse. every time they'd abuse me, i'd hurt myself in some way. and now, i can't seem to stop any of it. "
IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE?
[/size][/font]"again no sharpe objects. no lighters. no anything that i can manage to hurt myself with. and if i do have to have it then of course i need supervision to do it. "
THE MASTERMIND BEHIND IT ALL.
[/size][/font]hey, my name is NEENA.[/color] i have 23[/color] tracks spinning on my record. this is my FIRST[/color] character. i have been roleplaying for 7 years[/color]. the password is SILICONE AND SALINE, POISON, INJECT ME.[/color].[/font][/size]
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Carter hated that she had ended up in this place. Why couldn't she have just died and gone off to heaven and be done with it? But no, someone thought sending her here was more important, obviously. All in all, she had been keeping to herself. She didn't see the need to try to get close to anyone and no one was worth it if she couldn't be with Jak. He had been all she'd wanted since she met him. Now, thanks to the gang related activity, she couldn't be with him. She was only 16 but then again most of the people here were rather young. She didn't really think it was fair really. For her or for anyone else here. Life wasn't fair. Carter's life had really not been fair. She was born to early, almost died, adopted by a nice, semi rich family who ended up being terrible parents, had a pretty great brother who ended up killed, met a great guy but died before she was ever really able to tell him how she really felt. The only thing worse was the fact that Carter was being way to selfish about this. But that wasn't entirely true either. She often thought about how Jak was doing. In fact, most days he never left her thoughts. All she wanted to do was to see him again, be able to touch him. She knew that was more than impossible. First off, she didn't want him to die and second it was less likely that he would end up here. Either way, she couldn't stop herself from thinking about it from time to time.
Her being sent here really didn't surprise her all that much. The life she had had sucked. Her brother dying then she met Jak and things started to get better but shortly after that she was killed. It was rather obvious to Carter that someone didn't like her. The only other screwed up thing was what she had became when she got here, only it wasn't really that bad. Carter had become a Vampire. She had fangs and could run really fast. The fangs were one thing but her superior speed was another. It was actually pretty cool.
After wondering around for what seemed like forever, she'd made her way to the gym. Why? Well that she wasn't really sure about. Making her way over to the bleachers, she climbed up them and take a seat on the very top one. Grinning, she looked around the gym. As of now, it was empty and Carter didn't mind that at all. She loved being by herself and she had made it apparent to any and everyone that she wasn't really interested in making friends. At least not right now. She wanted some time to get use to this place and being here. And with what she had become. She was the same Carter, just slightly different in appearance but only somewhat.
Her being sent here really didn't surprise her all that much. The life she had had sucked. Her brother dying then she met Jak and things started to get better but shortly after that she was killed. It was rather obvious to Carter that someone didn't like her. The only other screwed up thing was what she had became when she got here, only it wasn't really that bad. Carter had become a Vampire. She had fangs and could run really fast. The fangs were one thing but her superior speed was another. It was actually pretty cool.
After wondering around for what seemed like forever, she'd made her way to the gym. Why? Well that she wasn't really sure about. Making her way over to the bleachers, she climbed up them and take a seat on the very top one. Grinning, she looked around the gym. As of now, it was empty and Carter didn't mind that at all. She loved being by herself and she had made it apparent to any and everyone that she wasn't really interested in making friends. At least not right now. She wanted some time to get use to this place and being here. And with what she had become. She was the same Carter, just slightly different in appearance but only somewhat.
