Post by MONICA EMILIE VERNE on Jan 21, 2010 15:42:45 GMT -5
MONICA EMILIE VERNE.
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* FEELS JUST LIKE WE'RE LOSING CONTROL.
and if you let go, then i'll let go tonight.[/center]
TELL US ABOUT YOURSELF.
"hello there, my name is monica. or if you want to be picky and you want my full name, which come on, no one will ever call me here, is monica emilie verne. most people just call me monica or mon, or sometimes by my last name, which i don't like so much, but i never say anything really. i don't tend to mind what variation of my name people call me, as long as its nothing annoying or insulting. my birthday is the twentieth of february, and i am twenty years old, though i've been told loads of times i look way younger than that. but hey, i'm not complaining. i'm female and i like boys, which in simple terms means i'm straight. boobs don't do it for me, thanks. i finished high school and got good grades and i went off to dance school, but had to quit because of my condition. i miss that place so much. so, i suppose you want to know what i look like? well, as you can see there are some pictures, but i'll give you a little personal insight too. i'm five foot nine, and i weigh next to nothing. i have red hair and am pretty pale, which was bad when i was a dancer because i had to use fake tan that made me look orange. i don't use it anymore of course. oh and i have blue eyes. i have really pouty lips too, that are hell to keep soft all the time, but hey, its part of being a girl i suppose. i wear a lot of different stuff, but i like bright colours mostly. as you can probably can tell. i'll wear anything as long as i think it looks good. but i pay attention to what people think too. thats me, i suppose."
TELL US ABOUT YOUR MEDICAL HISTORY.
[/size][/font]"where do i begin? well, i guess i should start with my physical condition hmm? well, here it goes. i have a severe heart problem called hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, which most people call HCM for short. from what i can gather from the babble the doctors gave me when they realized i had this disease, it has something to do with the muscles of my heart and stuff. it can be fatal in many people, but im on drugs to try and keep me from dying, but i can't dance anymore. otherwise i will die. which... hurts more than you could ever believe. i get short of breath all the time, and regular chest pains, and sometimes i get really dizzy and faint. but most of the time im just short of breath. and of course, with all this comes that i can't dance anymore, which brings my depression. i was diagnosed with that a little while ago. sometimes i just turn into myself, not wanting to talk to anyone. and sometimes i go out and dance, hoping it kills me. that has only happened once though, so i don't see myself as suicidal. just, increasingly sad that everything i had planned, everything i wanted to do with my life, i can't do anymore. even if i could dance still properly, no dance school would accept me because of my condition. but i guess thats just life. im on medication for the rest of my life, and if my condition gets any worse, which they have predicted it will, i have to have surgery. open heart surgery. i really hope it doesn't come to that, because the very thought scares me. so now you know. i have a heart condition that restricts my dreams, and because of this i'm depressed. not something i would say you would need to lock me up for but hey, i was forced to come here. assholes. and you should know, i don't insult people normally."
HOW CAN WE ACCOMODATE YOU BETTER?
[/size][/font]"accomodate me better? well, you could leave me alone? i'm not exactly the most socially apt person really. dance was always my way of expression. i suppose you could say i'm pretty shy really. i'm not saying i'm not friendly, because i am, i just prefer to be on my own than in a group of people. it makes me feel a little bit... uncomfortable you could say? i love healthy food, no carbs for me thank you. i'm no where near anorexic at all, but being a dancer you have to take care of your body and old habbits die hard. that doesn't mean i won't scoff a bit of candy every now and again as a treat, but thats what it is, a treat. i love reading a good novel, and i hope to find that there are plenty of good reads for me to stick my nose into. i don't like being told what to do. if i want to dance for a little bit i'm going to, and no one is going to stop me. heart problems or not. i'm not suicidal, i just refuse to give up the thing i love the most for my condition. i know my limitations. i like to take care of other people, rather than myself, its just the way i am. though, i don't tend to trusting of anyone. i hate opening up to people, but sometimes i expect them to open up to me. selfish? maybe i am. i'm scared of people understanding the real me, because i believe in myself that i'm too complex. i scare myself sometimes. i'm perfectly normal, i'm not saying i'm crazy, but, you know that little voice in your head, sometimes it makes me want to go crazy. i'm scared of dying, and i'm scared of having to have this open heart surgery they keep bringing up. i'm pretty scared of hospitals, because i'm terrified of going in and not coming back out. but, i'll stay strong. i'm a fighter at heart, ha, heart, and i won't be giving up any time now or ever. i'm someone who won't really back down so easily. i'm stubborn, and i can be a brat. i normally do as i'm told, but sometimes you just have to follow what you believe and do it your way. thats what i think anyways."
TELL US ABOUT YOUR PAST.
[/size][/font]"i don't really like talking about the past, not because it was overly bad or anything, i just... don't like it. but i suppose here it goes. i was born in kansas, pittsburg to be exact. my mum, charlie, died when i was pretty young, but my father, karl, has always been an amazing father. there is me and my brother, david, who is like me in male form, seriously. i love him to pieces. my family are the best things i have, they are seriously my rock. growing up was a little hard. my dad missed my mum, but it wasn't like he took it out on us, it was just... he was always sad, missed her. and me and david always missed our mummy. dad had a few girlfriends, which nothing came of. i don't think he will ever find someone he loved as much as my mum, which i like. i don't really like the thought of someone replacing mum. dad always helped me with my dancing, making sure i got lessons and got everything i needed. i found out, when the doctors found out i had my heart condition, that it was what mum died from, so it runs in the family obviously, but they never caught mums in time. they found out because i was in dance class, in my dance school that i was amazed i even got into, i was dancing and i just collapsed. they rushed me to hospital, did some tests and found i had the condition. i was told that i couldn't dance anymore, even on the tablets and that it would most likely get worse over time. i started getting really depressed and then dad thought it would be best to get some help, and hey, now i'm stuck here. maybe it is the best thing for me, i don't know. i hope so."
IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE?
[/size][/font]"not really, i suppose thats it really. a good few books, some healthy food, and i'll settle right in. there aren't too many people that can hurt me are there? i hope not."
THE MASTERMIND BEHIND IT ALL.
[/size][/font]hey, my name is LISHA.[/color] i have EIGHTEEN[/color] tracks spinning on my record. this is my SECOND[/color] character. i have been roleplaying for MANY YEARS[/color]. the password is silicone and saline, poison, inject me.[/color].[/font][/size]
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see zachary? is that ok?
